Black Lagoon RP (Cuz there´s no room for it elsewhere)

Sunlight woke Revy from her deep, dreamless slumber and a piercing headache followed suit. Rumbling engines, a bit of shaky ground- she was aboard the Lagoon, that was for sure. Why, didn´t matter right now- they´ve been drinking before, and she definitely felt that in every fibre of her body. Damn alcohol. Actually no, damn herself for drinking it.
"Ugh.... fuck." She cursed, groggyily sitting up and stretching- she didn`t even ask who stripped her down to her underwear, she was probably running on auto pilot last night and did that herself.
"Now where the fuck is it..." Searching around in her room, it took a good five minutes to find one of her Cutlasses... the other was still missing. Putting the gun to her head, she pulled the trigger and- yeah, empty. That isn`t gonna help against the headache... so she tossed it onto the bed instead. Time to find the other one- and some goddamn pants, preferably.

The sparkling blue green of the Southern China Sea, the light clouds drifting across the brilliantly clear sky, the wind whipping through his dark, toussled hair, the roar of machine guns blaring nearby...MACHINE GUNS! Diving to the deck of the Lagoon Company's torpedo boat, the former businessman instinctively covered the back of his neck and tried to hunker down behind the guard rails of the boat. Low calibur ammunition pinged off the starboard side of the Lagoon as the disgruntled captain veered off to take evasive action and yelled for Rock to keep his head down. Their computer specialist had the good fortune of being inside his nice, cozy workroom and Revy was in all liklihood still passed out in one of the sleeping compartments down below. "What is going on!!? Who's after us this time!?" the frightened Japanese man asked, his voice struggling to be heard over the gunfire and engine noise. Mr. Chang had mentioned that the cargo they were carrying for him was relatively valuable but he hadn't mentioned the competition would be this up to date on the delivery or this well armed. It was only one boat but they'd managed to get the drop on the Lagoon, appearing from behind an inlet to a nearby island the smaller speedboat was hot on their tail despite Dutch's efforts. This was going to be a long day.

"Keep the fucking noise down, Rock. My head´s a mess." Revy grunted at him as she finally came out of her cabin and onto the upper deck, hair messy and her eyes half closed. Her pistol holsters remained half empty, she didn´t have the patience to look for her second Cutlass at the moment. Nor did she wear anything underneath her hotpants, the boots were probably around somewhere... her top was a bit wrinkled, but that was to be expected.
A low thud was heard, along with a little shaking of the ship. A bit of steam flew by as she pulled Rock back by the hem of his shirt, looking towards the front where in the distance, a fast moving boat was seen.
"Hey, is that the starboard front torpedo tube? The fuck`s going on, did i miss the zombie apocalypse?"

"Revy!" Rock exclaimed at the sound of his only female crewmate's voice. Gagging a bit as he was hauled backwards, he remained in a low crouch, remember Dutch's lessons about presenting the smallest target possible. Fighting to keep his balance as the ship pulled another hard turn to try and get into a better position, Rock blinked as the walkie talkie clipped to his belt buzzed once. Evidently their captain was tired of shouting directions out the window and decided to just talk with him directly. "Hey Rock, we got some issues up here. Those guys on our ass are too quick to keep a solid bead on and that last pot shot took out the firing mechanism on one of my torpedoes." there was a pause which Rock attributed to the other man lighting a cigarette. "Basically we're getting our ass kicked. See if you can get Revy sobered up enough to be useful. The bazooka from the last job's got one shell left. Make it count."

Listening closely, a single bead of sweat appeared on Rock's forehead. His time in Roanapur had hardened him to dealing with criminals like Balalaika and Chang but a gun fight was still a gun fight. Gulping, he turned to the angry looking woman next to him. "Looks like these guys heard about the cargo we're carrying for Mr. Chang. Are you going to be able to pull off Dutch's plan?" No sooner had the question been asked another spray of gunfire pinged off the ship, one shot coming within inches of his left foot causing the former businessman to yelp and recoil backward in surprise.

Hearing the orders from their captain, Revy`s mind cleared up enough to go into auto-aim mode. Time to do some damage, alright. One RPG, thats not a lot, but if that ship was built anything like the Lagoon was, one was enough.
"Alright, alright, i get it. Before you come up with some crazy plan again, like strapping the damaged torpedo to a zipline to toss it over or something... I`ll save your ass. Gimme a sec."
With that she headed back down below deck, where an evasive maneuver smacked her into a wall.
"God damnit Dutch! I`m not ready for this stuff so early in the morning!"
Waving her fist at the cieling, she hurried over to the armory and picked up the RPG as well as a warhead, loaded it and headed back up, grinning fat and wide at Rock.
Captain Ahab reporting for Duty... now who´s gonna me my whale, huh?"
She climbed up to one of the posts that would ususally house guns and took aim.
Steady.
Steady... exhale.
Safety off.
A rough pull on the trigger to make up for the vibrations, and within a split second, the rocket was catapulted out of the launcher, making a beeline for the bridge of the enemy ship.... by the time it got there, the ship was ten feet further away, and the RPG pierced the hull right above the engine block, dispersing its deadly load right into it.

At the sight of Revy with a fully armed RPG and a gleeful smile, Rock couldn't help but feel a small twinge of fear run down his spine. The woman could be downright terrifying when she wanted to be. Taking refuge in the ladder shaft leading to the lower decks as Revy climbed up to his firing position, Rock watched as the enemy ship circled around for another strafing run. The shooping sound of the rocket came from Revy's weapon and the small warhead was off on its collision course with the other ship. Striking it near the engine, the rocket exploded with the full force of the vessel's fuel source behind it, nearly ripping the small speed boat in two. Fire and shrapnel spewed from the smoking wreck as a few screams of panic were heard from whatever was left living momentarily on board before it slowly began to sink beneath the ocean's waves.

Sighing with relief, Rock climbed back up to the top deck and wiped his brow. With any luck it would be smooth sailing from here on out. Reaching for his radio, he hit the call button for Dutch. "She got em Dutch. Looks like they were the only one in the area too." The only response he received was a large muscular arm being stuck out the window of the bridge in a thumbs up sign.

Leaving the launcher tube where it was, Revy hopped down from the small tower and landed on deck near the bridge.
"Hell yeah..! Is that a fireworks display or what?!" She yelled out, grinning wide and giving the flaming wreckage her favorite finger. After a little bit of self endulgement, Revy decided it was time to figure out what the hell was actually going on, so she walked over to Rock and slapped her hand onto his shoulder.
"What a way to wake up in the morning, eh, Partner? So who the hell was that, anyway?!" Another look at the sinking wreckage followed as the screams died down. "Huh. Guess it doesn´t matter anymore. Cheap sons of bitches didn`t even let me dance."

His stance shifted a bit as Revy slapped his shoulder but he held his posture regardless. Her bad mood from earlier seemed to have disipated entirely. Strange how excessive violence worked as a sure fire cure for Revy's hangovers. Lightly touching his fist to his chin, he gave some thought to the identity of the attackers. "Hmm, it was an older ship of asian make and not all that well kept. But simple mercenaries shouldn't have the connections to know about Chang's cargo, he didn't even tell us what was in the box which means its probably one of Chang's rivals trying to make him look incompetant or just another enemy of the Triad." he paused a moment to look back at the smoking remains of their attacker fading into the distance. "Those guys were disposable so we won't need to worry about anyone wanting revenge but until we drop off the box we're at risk." Putting his hands into his pockets, Rock let out a short huff. He didn't have enough information to draw anything further. "I really do wish we had more information on our cargo. Going blind like this makes things tough."

Crossing her arms with a smirk, she looked over his shoulder at him. Sometimes he was just thinking too much and doing too little.
"Open the box, then. If we`re carrying a primed nuke with us, i`d want to know... and our armory doesn`t look like we can take out more of those ships. So, Chang´s gonna have to forgive us for taking a peek at our cargo."
Then her headache came through again, and she grunted a little, leaning against the cool steel exterior of the bridge. "Guh, damnit. Getting shot at while a war is waging in my own fucking head ain´t fun. Feels like hell`s gonna break loose any second.. Only way this morning could end up worse is if the motherfucking Bloodhound is sleepin in our guest quarters."
Reviewing the day so far, her eyes were wide agape at this thought, and she tugged on Rock`s shoulder.
"....She`s not, right? Rosarita ain`t here. Tell me she ain`t here, Rock."

"Hmm, I suppose you're right. One look couldn't hurt." he said, heading for the cargo hold and grabbing a crowbar along the way. The mention of Roberta the killer maid of the Lovelace family caused him to visibly twitch, not quite entirely recovered from their last incident with the former FARC member. "D-don't worry Revy. There hasn't been any word of her anywhere near Roanapur since her last rampage. Supposedly the Lovelace household's been keeping a close watch over her during their recoervy period. We should be ok." he said, giving a seemingly calm, rational answer. There was no way Cisneros could be on the ship...right, no way.

Reaching the cargo hold, the large wooden crate sat isolated from the regular supplies aboard the Lagoon. Forboding with its lack of any markings, Rock slowly approached it and wedged the crowbar between one edge and began working the top off. The nailed in cover began to loosen and with a final heave Rock was able to wrench it loose. Catching his breath, he peered in over the edge of the newly opened crate. As he leaned over, there was a blur of motion and warm breath as a roar erupted in the cargo hold. Flinging himself back, he fell on his ass avoiding the occupant of the crate. Not quite able to make sense of what he'd just seen, he focused entirely on making a timely escape the way he'd originally come. "What is that thing!!!?" he screamed in panic. Though he'd felt the need to ask the question, he'd seen quite clearly what was in the now overturned crate and stalking towards him and his partner. He just couldn't believe it really. How the hell did Mr. Chang get his hands on a 400 pound saber toothed tiger?!

Revy simply blinked, taking a couple of steps back, then reached for her gun- right, empty. Crap. So, instead of an angry bloodhound, which would´ve probably been tameable through... unconventional means, they had a fucking tiger on their hands. Questions bloomed in her head.
Question one: Why the fuck didn´t they check before they loaded that thing on board?
Question two: Why the hell would those guys on the speedboat want a fatass tiger?
Question three: What do they do now?
"Rock... get out. Slowly. I`ll handle it." Revy stared the tiger into his or her eyes, then slowly walked up to it, croutching down to be less threatening. If that kitten she met in the streets was any indication of how cats worked, then... this might do it...?
"Here... i´m not doin` anything, ya see? I`m just a big ugly human, just like that guy over there. Calm down, Kitty. No one`s impressed."
To underline her words, as she thought of it as safe, she extended her hand towards the tiger and began to stroke through his furr. Either she´d be missing an arm in the next second, or they`d have a big problem on their hands getting him back into the crate.

Blinking rapidly, Rock was still in the process of trying to process how and why Mr. Chang decided to put a giant saber toothed tiger on their ship. Gradually backing up, he couldn't believe his eyes. Revy was actually trying to tame this thing!? "Revy, it's a freaking tiger. What are you doing!?" he hissed, his voice barely a whisper. However, despite the insanity of the situation, the tiger paused at Revy's words, examining her with what seemed to be honesty curiosity. It just stood there staring...staring...and then it all went to hell. The beast let loose another roar and reared up on its hind legs to attack the people before it. However, as it reared back, the animal let loose a yelp and fell backwards as a thrown crowbar hit it square in the face. Acting on instinct (read: panic) Rock at flung the crowbar he still held at the angry cat, thus saving the day for everyone. Well, at least that's what he wished would have happened. In truth, the surprised tiger simple fell back and hit its head on the nearby crate, knocking itself out. Unaware that his plan had actually worked, Rock was already bolting for the stairs and yelling for Revy to run for her life before ever seeing the tiger hit the floor.

Seeing a tiger stand on his hind legs and roaring out in a manner that shook the walls, even Revy was shaking all over. She`d been wrestling men consisting entirely of muscle and killing intent, but ususally they weren´t... that deadly.
After the shock had settled a bit, the gunwoman stood up again and grabbed the beast by its legs, tugging it back into the crate and sealing the lid- thankfully they did have a high powered stapler on hand, so the box was sealed again and she made sure to empty an entire fucking magazine of nails into the wood before she tossed the stapler away and scrambled upwards to find some fresh air.

Above sea level, the salty air seemed like a slice of heaven to her as Revy leaned against the superstructure of the crew quarters and sighed out deeply. Fuck, her hands won´t stop shaking.... neither did her knees. Or the rest of her legs.
"Goddamnit, calm the fuck down." She muttered to herself, lighting up a cigarette...
Chang`d better pay extra, she thought before yelling out to her partner.
"Ey, Rock, you`re here too, right?! Come out and change your daipers, we´re still alive."